She's a super creep, super creep (she's super creepy)

Whether you admit to it or not, we've all Googled ourselves at some point. Maybe you've Googled yourself before a big job interview. Maybe you Google yourself when you can't sleep. But most importantly, you should give yourself a good Googling before a date.

This week, we're breaking internet stalking down two ways: Googling yourself and Googling others. 

If you're recently returning or entering the dating scene, brush up on your SEO.

Thanks, SEO Gosling.

Remember that time you took that awesome selfie for your MySpace page that had lyrics from your favorite Hawthorne Heights song? Yeah. Your date's dog just had an allergic reaction to something, and they're gonna have to "reschedule."

Know all those drunk tweets you send out about how no one but your cat understands you? Seems like that hottie from the gym must have moved out of state and switched phone numbers, because it's been a long time since they have returned your invites to spin class.

Do yourself a favor and do a search for "[First Name] + [Last Name]" and "[First Name] + [Last Name] + [City of domicile]" and maybe even sub your profession or school or workplace etc in your search terms. See what comes up. Be prepared.

Tom Hardy did not anticipate the consequences of this MySpace centerfold

Next up, ditch your last name from your Twitter and Insta handles. The last thing you need is someone creeping on your Instagram photos for the next three years and commenting "Coulda been us but you playin'" when you 'gram your next beau.

If you really want to get snazzy, get down with original content for your dating profiles. Reverse Google Image Search will be your best friend when creepin' on prospective mates. Get ahead of the curve by taking some pictures that are OKC and Tinder exclusive. Good luck reverse searching me then, chumps!

 

I am an unabashed lover of research. I'm an academic. And I feel like some human intelligence collection is necessary before a first date. And now, I share with you, my standard operating procedure for conducting a pre-date review:

1. The reverse Google image search of OkCupid profile photos. 

2. The OkCupid username search (lawlz at folks that use the same username on OKC and Twitter)

3. If from Tinder, the first name/city search in Facebook.

4. The Google of first name (and all variations of it) with last name, occupation, location, alma mater.

Without a full legal name, step four can be daunting, but if you can glean their alma mater, their major, their line of business, their club activities, etc from conversation, you can mix a good search a query together. 

Keep in mind that Google is my last resort. A few tweets or your 'Likes' on Facebook or your 10,000 nude selfies on Instagram are usually enough to give me an idea of what to expect and whether to bail. 

There's no shame in searching, friends. Do it. Live by it. EMBRACE YOUR INNER SEO. Get those H1 tabs in check and hold on tight to your GA Real-Time dashboard, because this just got real. 

Sweetest search returns,

Fearless Leader.

It's a Small World After All: Week in Review

Hi, friends. After a long Memorial Day weekend out of town with family, this lady came back with full of WTCBA gusto. This post gets extra interesting because multiple aforementioned Bs are now familiar with the blog. If you're reading this, hi, boys!

I don't know about you folks, but every time I come across a coworker on either OkCupid or Tinder, after carefully reviewing their profile for every amusing detail, I promptly swipe left. I'd rather not complicate my work with life, nor my life with work. What's more difficult to avoid, however, is meeting someone online who is good friends with a coworker.

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Thursday

Peter* and I started chatting through OkCupid and arranged a date for last Thursday at the Edgewater Lounge, a neighborhood dive bar with a patio. He dropped his last name before we met, and I did what just about any crazy stalker curious person would do: Facebook creep. “Weird, Peter and I have two mutual friends! Huh, one is a coworker, and one is an old roommate from college.” Otherwise, his Facebook page was fairly private, so my creeping didn't uncover much else.

We meet, grab some beers, and sit on the patio to chat and enjoy the beautiful early summer evening. He asks where I work and I tell him. He asks if I know our mutual friend, and I have a really bad poker face. My mild Facebook creeping is revealed. (Also, he knows my old roommate through an ex). The date did go really well as we hopped dive bars the night away (additional stops were Simon's and Ollie's). More dates to transpire.

Friday

Friday night, Fearless Leader and I went on a WTCBA scouting mission. After being the lone single ladies in a crowd of dates at the Charleston, we move over to Danny's. We settle in at the bar with some shots and beers, and in walks a cute boy. Struck with a “he looks so familiar!”, I look at my recent Tinder messages and realize that this dude has to be Chris**. I message him on Tinder, and sure enough I was right. He doesn't figure out who I am initially, but eventually moseys up to the bar and says hi.

“Yeah, I'm with my friend who works with you! He was like, 'is the girl you're talking to named Elizabeth?'” Chris and my coworker went to high school together. Fearless Leader and I eventually part ways, and I proceeded to barhop along Milwaukee Ave. and get shitfaced with these guys.

Saturday

Saturday, after I slept away the bulk of my hangover, I go out for my first actual Tinder date. Kristopher** (not Kris) and I meet up, smoke a J, and get tacos. The tacos were hands down the best part of the date. Kristopher was cute enough, I suppose, but he didn't know how to stop talking even when he knew he was talking too much. He also had a total lack of self-confidence. I wasn't feeling it, and I think he could tell. We said farewell, and I went home to catch up on Game of Thrones and fall asleep on my couch.

Sunday

Sunday, I have a somewhat of a standing date with Chris** to watch the newest episode of Game of Thrones. I met him on OkCupid pretty early into my new-found singledom, and we've hung out quite a few times since. There was beer and pizza and the usual.

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If you've been keeping count, that makes a hat-trick of Chrises following a pair of coworkers'-friends over a period of four days. As they say, when it rains, it pours. But sometimes, the raindrop maybe is BFFs with someone you work with, or have the same name as some other raindrops you know. Life is weird like that.

*Not his real name
**Real name, because there were a jillion Chrises born in the '80s.

Until next time,
Elizabeth